I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
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