I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
i'm pretty sure the devil's penis is california-shaped
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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