just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
What kind of gift says: "I love you because you're my mom & I'm obligated to, but I don't like you" ?
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
Straight up asked lady in a lime green jumpsuit how to make your ass clap. That thing wiggled more beautifully than ocean waves at sunset
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
