I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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