I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
His hands were made for my vagina.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
