i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
this will be a night to untag.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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