I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
You kept saying you we're gonna puke and wanted to steal my pants
That does not explain the remnants of a small fire in my bathtub.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
