SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
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