can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
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