her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
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