I accidentally burped into my bong.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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