Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
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I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
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