She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
