everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
You know you started drinking too early in the day when you have a hangover at midnight
thats called having FUN
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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