I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
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