Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
he looked like jesus. just the kind of jesus i would have sex with.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Randomize
