he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Randomize
