I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Randomize
