Walk of Shame. In a state park.
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
You kept calling yourself a spider monkey... Then ran to the bathroom to "prepare for the main event"
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize