discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Randomize