Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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