Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Just bought a beer belt to complete the Captain America outfit. I will do my part as a hero of America to pass out beer to the good citizens of America.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
Mike's my new hero. There's a flagpole of hook-up's bras on his porch and a week's supply of beer in his fridge but he still has a great job.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
