Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Just as an add on, don't expect me to wear matching bra and underwear. If I do, I'm probably drunk and it's your fucking birthday. Have a great night.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
he told me he had a gf and in the very next sentence asked if I wanted to have sex.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
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