Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Randomize
