He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
She needs sedatives and a leash
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
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