Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
this will be a night to untag.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Randomize
