let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Randomize
