I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Sending me a thank you card for letting you fuck my sister was completely inappropriate
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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