yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
27 Of The Most NSFW Life Hacks
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
23 Disturbing Small-Town Horror Stories
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...