sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
Randomize
