Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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