let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Yes we can sext. I'm taking my socks off.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
Don't know where this pizza came from but i got breakfast in bed
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