Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
