playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
He showed up to the Seder drunk and tried to convince everyone that he could read Hebrew.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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