you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Randomize
