I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My kid just put flowers in my hair to make me pretty, then showed my boobs to an entire playground. He's either the best wingman or the worst.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
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