At least make sure they are 18
Why
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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