I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
