I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
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