This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Randomize
