It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Randomize
