The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
I got outsmarted by a door tonight. Twice.
Randomize
