Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
