i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
What even was the context for that. All I have written down is "I would vote for President SnakeJaw."
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
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