Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
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just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
I just delete my bank app from my phone to have enough storage to download tindr. Is this my life now?
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