he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
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