He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Boobs speak an international language.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
He stole one of my good bras again. If I'm not getting laid I'm not putting with this shit. Also it's a walk of shame for you today, my car is suicidal again.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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