he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
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