i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
I just talked to a CEO of a fortune 500 company while pooping. I LOVE being self employed.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
I tried to explain to the cop how we all have skeletons in our closets but he just wouldn't listen.
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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