Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
OH MY GOD I AM DYING. AS I WAS TEXTING I JUST BUMPED INTO A MOTHER FUCKING DEER. I AM SHAKING
Wait...Literally? You hit a deer...with your body?!
I PHYSICALLY RAN INTO IT. I FELT ITS WEIRD HAIR AND I EVEN APOLOGIZED CAUSE IT DINDT REGISTER THAT IT WASNT A PERSON. MORTIFIED.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
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