I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
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